Kicking Cancer's Ass - one day at a time

Better Than A Bag

2011-01-29T15:04:00.003-05:00

So a couple of weeks ago, Kyle and I stopped at a favourite restaurant of our on the cottage drive, Deb’s Restaurant on the Tynandaga reserve on Old #2 Highway in Shannonville. While it is not on the actual route, it is a detour we often take for gas or other purchases. Good home style food, generous portions,and no taxes are all part of the appeal. Be forewarned though, as it is on the reserve, non smoking legislation does not apply and you will find lots and lots of smokers. (They do have a no smoking section, but it is kind of like the no peeing section of the pool.)

One of the side effects of this round of chemo is my inability to regulate my temperature. I go from comfortable, to freezing to over- heated in the blink of an eye. As a result, when even we go inside a building, I keep my hat on, sliding it onto my shoulders when I get too warm, keeping it nearby ready to put back on my head when I cool down. It is important to remember this.

We had our dinner, were visited by the new chef who brought Kyle a tasting plate of the daily special, lasagne, and got our bill. While Kyle finished up, I headed off to pay and visit the ladies room before hitting the road. Anyway, I had finished up my business and flushed. As I turned around the toilet made a strange noise, and when I turned and looked, the hat that had been resting in my shoulder was laying in the bowl. I quickly grabbed the tie, and rescued it, rinsing the wet parts before carrying it out by the still dry tie. I asked the girl at the cash for a bag to carry it in and threw it in the truck. No big deal, I could wash it at the cottage.

After 5 days at the cottage, we returned home for my next treatment. In talking to my good friend Linda, I learned that she had the flu, and was suffering from it. She was very tired.

I regaled her with my hat in the toilet story and when I told her about asking the clerk for a bag, her response left me dumbfounded. “How was a plastic bag going to keep your head warm?” We both laughed over her misunderstanding, her tears finally stopped rolling down her cheek, we talked for a while longer and said goodnight.

The next day she emailed saying she was feeling a little better, and had been to the grocery story but was really tired. She told me she had not slept well the night before as kept on waking up all night with fits of giggles, but at least the tears had stopped. I replied to her, telling her she was a bitch when she was sick.

A week later, she was finally feeling better and we got together for coffee. When I got there, she presented me with a fleece neck wrap. It could be worn as a neck warmer, rolled and used as a ear muff, pulled up at the back and over the head for a hat that would not fall in the toilet, and finally, with an elastic holding one end closed, as a toque.

And as her daughter told us, “It’s better than a bag.”

~Inez

Why I Started This Blog

2011-01-24T22:21:00.007-05:00

I have decided to try and recall some of the entries I wrote in my head.

One, is why did I decide to do this.

When I started this journey, I knew as little about cancer and it's treatment as most people. And I found people had questions, but were afraid to ask. One girlfriend asked if I thought my cancer came back last spring because I had a lumpectomy instead of a mastectomy. She was very hesitant to ask, but wondered what she would do if it was her decision. I told her that given the size of the tumour, and the involvement of the lymph nodes, a mastectomy would have make little or no difference. And my opinion had changed as a couple of years ago, I was astounded that a woman I knew chose a lumpectomy over a mastectomy.

This blog, and my openness gave her somewhere to ask. I don't claim to have all (or many answers), I hope that this gives people somewhere to start with their questions.

Also, we watch those around us go through things, and we don't know what to do. We don't want to ask questions, or to intrude or appear nosy. But hopefully by writing, more of us will be able to talk to our friends about what they are going through, and listen to them. And maybe like me, their friend's questions will open doors for them.

Also, I got tiring, telling the same story over and over again. And remembering who I had told, or who I had sent an email to got more difficult with the effects of chemo brain ( the mental fog that affects chemo patients).

~Inez

More treatments

2011-01-23T11:58:00.008-05:00

It has been a long time since I have updated you. I often write updates in my head, in bed, late at night. But of course these do not appear here.

There have been 3 more treatments since my last update. Originally Dr. Z said he would probably do 3 treatments, but somewhere along the way he decided it would be 6 treatments. This was in spite of the fact that my CT scan had been positive. Anyway,on to my treatments.

My 4th treatment, in early December, was the absolute worst, considering the first round back in 2008 and the previous 3 treatments. The actual treatment itself was uneventful, and proceeded normally, without incident. As the week went on however, it was clear that this treatment was different.
By the end of the week I had a number of strange effects. First, the skin on my fingertips thickened, until it felt like I had dipped my fingers in glue. Also, I had very little sense of touch. Within 5 days, they peeled off, in big pieces. And the strange mouth feel, with everything including water, feeling furry returned. It is hard to explain the effect, but once you experience it, you will never forget it. Drinking anything became uncomfortable, and of course you need to keep well hydrated following any treatment.

Food also lost all taste of salt. I could still taste sweet, so chocolate bars (m-m-m Big Turks are my favourite) became a staple. We had 2 special dinners to attend, so the food was interesting. Following the first one, rick's 60th birthday, I asked Kyle if the dinner had been any good. I had mislead one of my fellow dinners by telling her you could not taste the shrimp in a dish, forgetting that I could not taste anything anyway.

The second dinner was our family Christmas dinner. Again, I could not taste anything, although I did eat a full dinner, trying everything. I was assured everything was yummy.

Kyle and Greg made a trip to the cottage to finish a couple of jobs, and to deliver a batch of presents etc for Christmas. While they were gone, I slept a lot and ate very little. When you are not hunger, and there is no one to cook for, you tend not to eat. This probably lead to my sleeping a lot (10 - 12 hours a day).

By the week before Christmas, my energy levels were a little better and my taste had returned, but I found that my appetite was greatly reduced. I managed to eat a little of Christmas dinner, sampling everything, but not eating very much.

And of course, it was time for my next treatment again. Kyle, Greg and I returned from the cottage on Wednesday the 29th and I saw the doctor and received my treatment on the 30th. Kyle and I returned to the cottage that evening. We invited Kevin and Gloria up for New Year's.

By the end of that weekend my taste had disappeared again. This time however, because there was always someone around, I was cooking for someone else and forced myself to eat every day. Mornings I generally had a bowl of cereal, and I at least a little supper each day. I don't know if I was eating because I felt better, or if I felt better cause I was eating, but this round was much easier than the last. So I guess I learned that regardless of whether or not I want to eat, I have to. Again my finger tips peeled but not to the extent of the prior treatment.

This brings us to this weeks treatment. Again, the treatment itself was pretty uneventful. Karen came with me and we went off to breakfast after I was connected for my infusion and then we returned for the the afternoon's events.

While my treatment was uneventful, two of my fellow patients did not have such an easy day. One patient was the father of a past co-worker from Block. She came over and visited with us, because as she said, her dad was so zonked out on Morphine and benadryl, he did not even know if she was there or not. The other patient had a bad reaction, his blood pressure falling drastically and his collapsing on the way to the bathroom. Karen ended up assisting the nurse until her (the nurse's) panicked calls brought her co workers to assist her.

As for further treatments, I am scheduled for one more, but I do have another CT Scan scheduled for next week. Dr. Z indicated that 8 is usually the maximum nuber of treatments, as thay are so draining on the patient, so regardless of what the CT Scan shows, there will probably be only 2 more treatments for some time.

So that brings us to today, Sunday. Things are starting to taste furry again and salt taste is gone, but I have been eating. I will keep on drinking water and get the sleep I need.

Oh, and one final thing. I have formally taken a leave of absence from H & R Block this year. The door is open if I change my mind, but for now I am OK with not working. I t is weird not teaching, or attending classes, and I am sure the first week of February will be weird, but I need to take care of me for a while.
~Inez

Adventures In Chemo Land

2010-11-18T07:29:00.009-05:00

Another treatment down. My treatment Monday was a long day. But before we go there, let's talk about my CT Scan on Thursday. When I saw the doctor on Friday for my pre-treatment visit, they already had the results, and the news was good. The previously treated lesions on my spine all show indications of healing, and there is nothing new. So Good News there.

I was accompanied by my friend Linda to this treatment, as Kyle is up at the cottage for the week. The visit was pretty uneventful, right up to the point where the nurse came to disconnect me. She picked up the orders and read through them. She got to the bottom and asked me if I knew anything about pamidronate. I asked what is was for and she explained it was used following treatments for bone cancer to minimize and help bind calcium.

Of course I knew what it was then, and I explained the problem I had with the BoneFos. Now the nurses were conferring among themselves, and out loud. Why didn't the pharmacy send it up, and why did the first 2 or 3 nurses catch the order. So they paged Dr. Z and the the doctor that I say on Friday. No reply from either of them. The Pharmacist arrived and they conferred again. The nurse finally found a note in my chart, from October 27th by Dr. Z stating that I would be receiving it so the Pharmacist set off to prepare it.

In the meantime, they brought the orders back to my chair, and I had a chance to read them. The very 1st line referred to the pamidronate. So 3 or 4 nurses managed to miss the order, along with the Pharmacy. What if it had of been something that could have cause drastic results if missed.

I have placed a call to my primary care nurse and the Manager of Systemic Therapies. I am concerned that an error like this could have life affecting results in other circumstances, and it is not for me, as the patient to be reading the orders and making sure they get it right. Anyway, this cycle is done and now I wait to see if I need another treatment. I see Dr. Z on the 26th so I will know more then.

chemo Update

2010-11-01T15:18:00.003-04:00

I guess it is about time I update everyone. My last chemo treatment was a week ago. And it was generally uneventful, hence the lack of updates. (Block friends will love that reference at this point in their course of studies).

That aside, I had another infection in the port site, so in the 5 days before treatment, Dr. Z had me on another course of antibiotics. And it cleared up, so that they were able to access my port for my treatment. And as I said, it was uneventful. The port was easily accessed and the treatment was quick and easy.

I am currently at home without my own wheels for the next couple of weeks while Kyle and Greg take part in the annual male bonding exercise known as deer hunting. I have Mandy's car to use when she is not in school and her BF even offered me his truck, so I am not stranded.

So until something interesting happens, I quess that is all for now, Bye

~Inez

Gone Again

2010-10-19T10:01:00.003-04:00

So it has come to pass that my hair is falling out again.

Yesterday, I was constantly picking hair off my shirt, but it did not dawn on me that it was falling out. Last night while having coffee at Linda's, we were talking about my nails and how they seemed to be in good condition, when I ran my fingers through my hair and was left holding a handful of it.

So, the plan this morning is to shave my head again, get it all over with in one fell swoop. Having it fall out on it's own just is not an attractive look. Now all I have to do is find all my hats from last time.

~Inez

Back Into The Fray

2010-10-13T22:30:00.002-04:00

I guess it is time to update everyone on the last week. Saturday passed uneventful. Sherry and I went out for breakfast. The nurse arrived around 1 o’clock and started a new IV, as the one they started Friday at the Cancer Centre won’t work. She hooked me up to my IV pump, which I would be toting around for the next 26 or so hours. I spent a quite day, as my right hand was bandaged up like a prize fighter, and there was not much I could do.

Sunday arrived and I was going nuts. I found a large pair of rubber gloves, so that I could at least do the dishes. Afterwards, I noticed a wet spot on the dressing, and saw that the IV line had come undone. I was able to do it back up. I called in to the agency and let them know what had happened. The nurse called and said that since I had done it back up there was nothing to worry about.

I watched a little tv and decided to make myself some lunch. As I was opening my can of soup, and was shaking it into the pot, I noticed water spraying all over the place. My IV had come loss, just as the pump entered its’ active phase. It was splashing all over, in my soup so I poured it down the sink, so much for lunch. I turned the pump off, and called the agency again. They said they would notify the nurse. She called in about an hour saying she would be there soon. When she arrived she was surprised to hear that my IV was not finished, since the office had not called her. Her call had just been to let me know she was on the way.

She attempted to restart my IV (4 times) and finally admitted defeat. She sent me off the Emerg, again, for them to restart the IV, or to reassess me. Luckily Sherry was nearby and she drove me to the hospital. She seemed hesitant to leave me, but I anticipated another long wait and convinced her I would call if I needed a ride.

This visit was much more pleasant than the last one. After my initial interview with the triage nurse, I was ushered inside were I was seen by the doctor within 5 minutes. Almost immediately, Adam, the nurse was in and on the 2nd attempt got my IV started. He used a new style of IV and clamp. They ran the full course of antibiotics and he wrapped me up with IV in place ready for Monday.

Monday morning we saw Dr. Zalewski, and he was pleased with the process of my port infection. He ordered another week of antibiotics, oral to make sure we got it all. He decided that my treatment would take place, so off to the chemo suite we went. When we got in, the nurse was questioning whether to use the IV or port, as the orders did not indicate either. After a wait of almost 45 minutes, the doctor confirmed that she should NOT use the port and to use the IV. But guess what, she could not draw any blood through it. She had to run another IV. I think that by now I up to about 9 attempts/or accesses in my hand. Anyway, she starts another IV and it was off to the races.

This chemo drug is extremely hard on your nails, so in order to slow down the circulation in your hands and feet, they wrap them in freezer packs, imploring you to keep them on as long as possible. You are courting frostbite in an effort to protect your nails. Kyle spent the whole period jumping up and down either taking the ice packs off or putting them back on my feet, my hero. Anyway, I survived the freezing and the treatment was soon over.

Tuesday started a new adventure. We started with a 10 am visit to Sunnybrook, for Mandy’s 4-month check-up. We ended up10 minutes late, as the 401 was at a stand still and the arterial roads were not much better. We made it and her doctor was pleased and she received the good news that her check-ups were now going to be every 6 months. We stopped at IKEA on the way home and did a little shopping and had lunch.

After a short rest at home, we headed out again, this time to Toronto General Hospital for Kyle’s CT Scan. We left at 4:30 for a 6:30 appointment as you never know what kind of trouble you are going to run into driving into downtown Toronto, given the mornings adventure. We arrived at the doors of Toronto General in 38 minutes. Now he was almost 90 minutes early for his appointment. He decided to go in early, get his hospital id card (figures, they closed at 4 pm) and headed down to imaging. The technician came out, asked if he could drink that yummy water is 30 minutes, and they took him in early. He was done and out before his 6:30 appointment time. And we were home before he should have been done.

Wednesday was my post treatment nursing visit. My blood pressure was fine and she took off my port dressing. And of course that meant I would get to have my first shower in a week. Yippee. She did not have a suture removal kit, so will have to wait until next week to have my stitch in my neck removed.

Kyle and went to the cottage alone for Thanksgiving. Greg wanted to go paintballing and Mandy was going with Luke to his Nan's.

We spent a pretty quite weekend, we had Thanksgiving Dinner with John and Nancy and Jay on Sunday night. It was the first time since we have owned the cottage, that I did not do Thanksgiving at our place. On Monday we went into Pine Valley and had another Thanksgiving Dinner.

Today was Kyle's visit to see the surgeon at Princess Margaret Hospital. Good News, he does not have cancer.

Anyway, That is all for now.

~Inez

Still At It Part 2

2010-10-01T15:46:00.003-04:00

So I saw the doctor again this morning and he is pleased with the progress being made on the port site. The infection is breaking up and looking better. I had another course of antibiotics this morning. He also ordered 2 more courses for Saturday and Sunday, to be done through home care.

So I am home this weekend, having sent Kyle and Greg off to the cottage.

I plan on reading, sleeping and treating myself.

On Monday morning, I see Dr. Zalewski again and if all is well, I start my chemo on Monday.

So, til then, ciao

~Inez

Still At It

2010-09-30T08:49:00.009-04:00

I guess a lot has happened since June.

First issue was the biopsy request from mammography. Even though Dr. Zalewski did not feel I should bother with it, they scheduled it anyway. When I went in, I met with the nurse and did all the pre-procedure stuff. We were planning on heading to the cottage afterwards, so I was not thrilled that I would not be able to get the incision wet for 7 to 10 days. Next I met with the surgeon. As he was reading the report, he told me that since I had had surgery (the lumpectomy) that what was on the film was in all likelihood calcium and had he done the original reading, he would have asked for the films to be repeated in 6 months, not for a biopsy. So, I ended up not doing it, electing instead to have the films redone in 6 months. (that will be December).

I had a scare following my Bone Scan. The scan taken 6 weeks after treatment showed increased activity. How can this be - I felt great - no pain for over a month. I spent a stress filled weekend worrying about this. When I say him,Dr. Koll explained that the scan was compared to the one done in April almost 2 months before the treatments, and that when they did the radiation plan, they based on the MRI, and treated all the areas indicated in the current bone scan, and that the activity was consistent with the after effects of radiation. Again he said, the number one indicator was that I felt good, no pain at all. As part of the followup, they did however schedule me for another CT Scan.

So, following my latest round of tests (bone scan and CT) it was discovered that there was a 2ND lesion on my back. Good news was that it was not yet causing me any pain so it was quickly treated with 1 session of radiation (on September 21). I also had another reaction to the bonefos, so that coupled with the lack of effectiveness with either the Arimidex or the Tamoxifin, Dr. Zalewski decided that I needed another round of chemo. So to that end, I had a new port put in on Tuesday (Sept 28).

And that is when the fun started. Tuesday was pretty uneventful. I arrived at the hospital, got an iv and prepped for the procedure. I explained the problems I experienced with the last port and and nurse accused me of sleeping on it wrong, and they decided leaving my bra would probably work. The procedure was done, and recovery of 60 minutes and then home.

The next day I waited patiently for home care. There seemed to be a little bruising under the dressing but nothing I was overly concerned about. About 3:45, I started to be concerned as I had yet to here from anyone regarding when the Nurse would be there. I called the woman who had set it up on Monday and explained my concern. She gave me the number to call and within 20 minutes I heard back and the nurse was on her way. After about 30 minutes of history and paper work, she checked the incision and dressing.

While the incision looked good, for an incision, the area around it was red and hot. You need to go up to the hospital, she said. She replaced the dressing, traced the red area and off to the hospital I went. After a wait of more than 3 hours, I was finally seen by the doctor. I had and infection and was going to need a course of IV antibiotics, and the next day, he had asked for the port to be removed and a new one to be inserted. While this made no sense to me, off we went for the IV. I got home at almost midnight, after nothing to eat or drink for over 7 hours except for half a glass of ice water at 10:30.

One of the things I had been told was not to eat or drink anything when I got up until the hospital called. Not being into fasting at the best of times, at 10 am I called the hospital to see if I had been scheduled, and after being transferred hither and yon, some one finally took the care to listen to my tale. she physically tracked down the orders, got hold of my primary care nurse. She, Kelly, called me right away and and had me come into the Cancer Centre. I saw Dr. Zalewski. He ordered another course of IV antibiotics and I am to return later today (Friday).

Above is a picture of my bunny infection. Believe it or not, this is actually looking better than yesterday.

So that is where I stand right now. I am due to the hospital withing the next hour and will know what is happening then.

~Inez

2010-06-30T21:33:00.003-04:00

It has been almost 3 weeks since I last posted. A lot has happened.

First, I have had all my radiation treatments. I am still experiencing back pain, in fact most days are worst than before I started the treatments.

Next, last week, I developed hives, probably a reaction to the Bonefos medication. They have since cleared up, and I am ready to go back on the Bonefos, but at a much lower dosage to build up a tolerance.

Finally, from my mammogram last week, they have requested a biopsy, but Dr. Z is advising against it, since I am already being treated for the lesions on my spine. When I questioned my nurse about it, and the possibility of a mastectomy, she said it was way too much to go through when I was already being treated for the spinal lesion.

So I guess until I see the Oncologist again at the end of August there is nothing to do but continue living. Life is going on as usual. Warts and all.

~Inez

2010-06-11T11:42:00.004-04:00

Kicking Cancer's Ass - Part 2

This past winter and spring, I found myself suffering from a lot of back pain. I have suffered from this before, and really did not give it a lot of thought.

Anyway, April comes, and one Friday, I am in so much pain, nothing is helping it. I leave work at Noon, pick Kyle up and head to urgent care. They do a series of back x-rays and prescribe T3s. Fast forward to the next week.

Dr. P has the results. It shows a little arthritis in my lower back (L4). Because of my history, he orders a bone scan to rule out anything else (the c word). Bone scan completed and confirms L4/5 abnormality. Next step, MRI.

When we go in to get the results. MRI confirms a growth. Dr. P tells me to get a hold of my doctors at the cancer centre right away and book appointments. We fax all the reports, x-rays, scan and MRI. I get in to see both of them within the week.

Yesterday I saw both Doctors, Zalewski, who deals with medications and chemo, and Koll who is in charge of radiation.

They confirm, given the lack of any back trauma, and the absence of anything on prior scans, in all likeliness, this is cancerous. So the plan is 5 sessions of radiation, starting the 16th of June. Planning session was taken care of within an hour of seeing Dr. Koll.

Dr. Zalewski has changed my medications, switching me from Arimidex to Tamoxifen and adding Bonefos - a bone strengthening medication. I will be taking it in capsule form, although it is available as an infused product.

So that is where we are today. I am still a little raw, trying to absorb all of this. Doctor Koll says the prognosis is good, and that he has many patients that come in every 6 - 9 months - 2 years to get another spot blasted. So until I have the full CT Scan and the results from that, we are in a holding pattern.

Right now I need your support, I already feel shitty enough.

I will be talking to you all again soon.

~Inez

I'm late, I'm very, very late,...and sorry I haven't updated for so long.

2009-06-25T08:38:00.002-04:00

I have been reminded by a few of you that I have not updated for sometime. After tax season ended, I just decompressed and seemed to fall apart. I didn't feel like doing anything. So I am sorry I haven't kept you all up-to-date.

So, in the early morning of may 20th, I again visited emerg. My oxygen was fine but I was again in Congestive Heart Failure (CHF). The doctor suggested doubling my water pills for 3 days then returning to normal dosage. Since then, I have been feeling OK (no need for midnight visits to emerg).

We are up to 29 days at the cottage so far this year. last weekend Rick and Mary Anne came up with us. It was great weekend. We got the dock in (no one ended up in the lake this time) and the summer patio furniture on the deck. My chrome rims are on the truck (sweet) and summer is truly here.

On the health front, I had good news and bad this week. Last week (Monday) was my annual Mammogram. On Tuesday received a call asking me to come in for more pictures of my right breast and an ultrasound too. It was booked for yesterday. Good news, it appears that there was a piece of tissue that folded over. When they redid they mammogram, they compressed the breast more (translated: crushed the bejezzup out of it) and it's gone. They also could not see any trace of it on the ultrasound, so Yeah, good news.

I had another MugaScan last week also. It was on Tuesday. I saw the cardiologist on Monday of this week, and I also had another Echo cardiogram. My heart function is down again, and he has increased one of my medications. Let's see if this makes any difference.

For me, this news was devastating. The CHF has taken the wind out of my sails. It has affected me way more than the cancer itself. Having to take a rest after climbing the stairs, being wiped out by the hike to the x-ray department, and needed to rest for half a day to recover from that hike. I think of returning to Italy, and I know that those walks up into villages, like Cortona and San Gimignano, will be impossible right now. And that knowledge makes this CHF even worse than the physical symptoms.

We are heading up to the cottage today and I hope to relax but also get some lake time in, and get some little cleaning jobs done, a little at a time.

~Inez

Another Emerg Visit

2009-05-03T15:37:00.002-04:00

On Thursday, April 23, I spend another fun filled evening in Emergency. I woke at 1:30 am unable to catch my breath again. I got Greg to drive me to the hospital and he stayed with me for an hour or so. They monitored me overnight, but did not put me on oxygen. They took blood and did a chest x-ray at 5:30 am. I finally saw the doctor at 6 am and he put me on water pills (iv injection first). He had the internist see me and I was finally out of there at 10 am. I went into work about 12 that day.

The End of Chemo

2009-04-17T01:03:00.004-04:00

Today's post is bitter sweet. Following my muga scan earlier this week, I saw my oncologist for blood work before the resumption of my Heceptin on Friday. My MUGA results are not good - a decrease actually- and the oncologist actually just wanted to remove my port and simply cancel the rest of the treatments. I convinced him to leave it until after I talk to the cardiologist but, after seeing him, I am doubtful that the treatments will restart.

I was pretty upset, but after reading more on Herception, maybe it is not that bad. I just feel so betrayed by my body - I don't really have any say as it hinges on my heart improving.

~Inez

hair and more hair

2009-04-09T07:33:00.003-04:00

First may I say that I almost have a full head of hair. Unfortunately, I also have a chin full.

Since early February, I have been noticing increased hair growth, notably on top of my head. Office staff who worked every couple of days or so always comment on how much more hair I have since the last time they were in. It is getting to the point where there are some many different lengths, I am going to have to get it trimmed. I think I look like a Chia Pet.

Yesterday, Mandy decided that my chin was in need of some tweezering. I let her pluck one hair and that hurt. I guess I will have to bite the bullet and let her do the rest. I am luck though, that my eyelashes and brows are coming in normal, so far I have escaped the alien hair thing happening.

Well that's all for now , but shout outs to John and Julie for the lovely flowers and my office staff for the flowers to celebrate the end of my radiation.

~Inez

Free Mammographies

2009-04-02T08:20:00.001-04:00

I received this today, and not for the first time. It’s legit according to Snopes (http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/charity/mammogram.asp) so please take a second and give it a click, every day if possible.

The Breast Cancer site is having trouble getting enough people to click on their site daily to meet their quota of donating at least one free mammogram a day to an underprivileged woman. It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on ‘donating a mammogram’ for free (pink window in the middle). This doesn’t cost you a thing. Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate mammograms in exchange for advertising.
Here’s the web site! You can only click once a day so please pass it along to people you know…

http://www.thebreastcancersite.com/

~Inez

Radiation is done, but it's effects aren't

2009-03-29T08:01:00.005-04:00

I finished my radiation on Monday (March 22nd). It was a great feeling, signing in for my treatment and not seeing any upcoming appointments.

I had to see the nurse, as my burns have opened up and are wet and weepy. She was very upset with me for putting a dressing on my neck. Because it is located in the crease of my neck, and every time I move my head, it seems to weep more, I felt covering it was the best thing for work. Anyway, now I leave it open and hope for the best. I try to wear wide necked tops, which leaves it fully uncovered and exposed. As bad as my neck wound is, the ones under my breast are the worst. As you can imagine, there is a lot of chaffing. About the only relief I can get is to line my bra with with patches of flannel diapers. The nurse and even the radiation techs all said that it was going to get worse before it gets better, and that I should take some time off of work. I might just have to do that. I will decide this coming week, depending on how things progress.

My breathing is better, and I find I have more stamina than even 2 weeks ago. I am scheduled to see the cardiologist in 2 weeks, and then the oncologist, so hopefully my heart function has recovered and my treatments can continue.

Well, I guess that is all for now. A special thank you goes out to Linda and her sister Ellie, for the information on diet and wound care/healing. I will try to eat right. And to all my staff in Bowmanville, Thank you for the flowers and the cupcakes. You all mean a lot to me.

~Inez

Herceptin is a wondeful cancer drug

2009-03-01T20:16:00.003-05:00

...but it is not without its side-effects.

My herceptin treatments are being delayed for 9 to 10 weeks, because of Herceptin-induced Congestive Heart Failure. It took 2 over night visits to Emerg and a Muga scan results showing a decrease in function of more than 50% to get me to a cardiologist to diagnose this.

Both Emerg visits came after an hour of laying in bed gasping for air. First visit resulted in a puffer and being sent home to followup with family doctor. Second visit was more thorough, detected fluid in lungs, and treated with antibiotics but no mention of heart trouble.

It took the poor MUGA results for the oncologist to request an emergency referral to the cardiologist. He, the cardiologist, feels we can reverse these results and then continue the Herceptin with constant monitoring in 6 to 7 weeks.

This is the scariest time in my course of treatment. My mother died of heart failure, and she was only 53. She beat breast cancer, back in the mid sixties. Now I battling them both at the same time.

On the radiation front, I only have 6 treatments left. They have been going pretty good. It is a constant battle to get out of the office on time to make it to the hospital, and some day I end up going back to the office after my treatments.

Work is work this year. I have great office staff and everyone is pitching in. They make it easy for me to deal with my treatments and not worry too much about the office.

I will try to post more often.

~Inez

Hospitals, Nurses and Radiation

2009-02-17T08:06:00.003-05:00

Famous last works, 6 days after my last Emerg visit, 1 am again, and back we go. This time a different doctor listens to my chest, says he isn't happy with the sound and sends me for chest xrays. He says I have a lung infection, prescribes antibiotics and sends me home. Seven days later, (the length of the script) takes us to Monday and I am still having trouble breathing. On top, my latest Muga scan (whatever the hell that is) shows decreased heart function, caused by the chemo, so they have delayed my treatments of herceptin by at least a week or two, while we wait to repeat the test.

And when I went for blood last week, they screwed up accessing my port again, and Nurse Cratchett put in an appearance. Even though both Mandy (DD) and I told her we did not mind waiting for someone who could actually do it properly, she took a stab at it, fucked up too and before she could try again, I left to make my oncology appointment where I found out about the mugu results.

While waiting for the Oncologist, Mandy set off in search of the Team leader for chemo to register a complaint about Cratchett. She said her Dad and I were to nice to say much, but she was not going to let me be assaulted by Cratchett. I love my baby. Any way, when we went back down, Cratchet was no where to be seen, and all my favourites were there. I even got a leg massage from one of the nurses while the other one ran my port.

And yesterday was my first radiation treatment. It is no worse that the muga scan, and a lot shorter. Just laying in an awkward position for about 5 minutes. The real problem though is going to be the appointment times. I was told later day would not be a problem, but Wednesdays have to be in the morning to see the radiation oncologist. And on days when I have chemo (when my herceptin restarts) I will end up going to work, to the hospital and pack to work. I really wanted to make them late enough to just go home.

And speaking about my lung infection, I finished the antibiotics yesterday and still fin my breathing laboured. I am using my puffer every 4 hours, so now I guess I have to fit an appointment with my GP in with everything else.
I guess that is enough whining for now.

~Inez

Visit to Emerg (or the ER for my American Friends)

2009-02-08T10:04:00.004-05:00

So I started back to work on the 2nd and things have been going pretty good. I find that I am I little more tired, but considering I haven't working since May, that is understandable. As I have experienced with some of the treatments, I have found myself out of breath after walking in from the parking lot, especially if I am carrying my work bag, computer case and purse.

On Tuesday night, I joined the girls for coffee. On our way out, I told Karen if I wasn't feeling well, I wanted her to drop me of at Emerg on our way Home. (why spoil coffee!) I was feeling pretty good and we went straight home. I went to bed. I woke about 1:00am unable to catch my breath. My chest felt wet? and heavy. I propped my self up with pillows and tried to go back to sleep. Well, that didn't work and after about 10 minutes of gasping and hacking, I got dressed and had Greg drive me to the hospital. They put me in a wheel chair and wheeled me into acute care right away. They said my chest sounded clear, did blood work and gave me a puffer. They sent me home, and I was back in my own bed by 5am. I don't use the puffer every 4 hours as indicated, maybe 2 or 3 times a day, as needed.

I am feeling pretty good, and I think as I start getting more exercise, running around the office, I will start feeling better.

I have a great staff and they are looking out for me. They are constantly after me, not letting me carry supplies, putting things up for me and generally looking after me. I don't think I could over do it, even if I wanted to.

~Inez

Life Goes On

2009-02-01T20:20:00.004-05:00

I better write this now or I may never get around to it.

Tuesday, January 27th was my radiation planning session, and the day that I got my first tattoos ever. Of course, they were courtesy of the radiation department, and are simply 4 small dots, used to line me up it the machine. I start my treatments on the 17th of February.

Tomorrow is my first full day back to work. My office opens tomorrow. For those how don't know, I work for H & R Block in Canada. I manage the office during the tax season (February to April 30th her in Canada). Our office is newly renovated and I am looking forward to the tax season. It will probably be a challenge as I move through my radiation treatments, but I will take it one day at a time.

~Inez

Wohoo - Last Chemo Treatment

2009-01-25T20:22:00.002-05:00

Friday, January 23rd was my last chemo session. I am now going to be receiving infusions of herceptin every 3 weeks, but only need to see the doctor once every 3rd session.

My blood numbers for any who is interested are:

LKC (white) Jan. 23 -6.7 Dec. 30 - 6.6 Dec 5 - 6.8 Nov 13 - 4.8 Oct. 23 -5.7 October 2-6.0 Sept 11-5.5

ERC (red) Jan. 23 -4.13 Dec. 30 -4.09 Dec 5 -4.04 Nov 13 - 3.92 Oct. 23-4.44 October 2-4.51 Sept 11-4.60

HB (hemoglobin) Jan. 23 -113 Dec. 30 - 113 Dec 5 - 113 Nov 13 - 110 Oct. 23-123 October 2-123 Sept 11-128

PLT (platelets)Jan. 23 -300 Dec. 30 - 292 Dec 5 - 333 Nov 13 -326 Oct. 23-320 October 2-259 Sept 11-272

Neut# Jan. 23 -5.0 Dec. 30 -5.0 Dec 5 - x Nov 13 -x Oct. 23-3.9 October 2-4.4 Sept 11-3.6

Imagine my surprise when the door at chemo opened and Nurse Crackett stood there, calling my name. She was pleasant and very informative. I was amazed - of course, she did not get the chance to fill me fun of holes as my port had been accessed the day before. Anyway, she was just covering another nurse's break, and I did not see a lot of her.

Tomorrow, the 27th (Tuesday)is my radiation planning session.

~Inez

Cold!!!...and SNOW

2009-01-18T09:53:00.002-05:00

It has been so cold for the past week, daily highs of -17C. And now it is snowing. It started last night around supper time and it is still snowing. It looks like it is about 6' deep and forecast is for snow for the rest of today and tomorrow, and Wednesday.

Is it ever going to stop?

~Inez

Mandy is Cancer Free

2009-01-09T11:21:00.004-05:00

Just a quick update, but Mandy saw her surgeon today, and he informed us that all of her lymph nodes were negative, there was no cancer in them, so she is clear. He said her chances of recurrence were 1 to 3%. She will require increased scanning and followup for the next couple of years, but we are so relieved.

As to my genetic followup, I do not have any abnormalities in the BRAC 1 or 2 genes, I will require some more close screening, because of the familiar cluster, but this is good news and I am so relieved. Now I do not have decide if I want to have double mastectomy because it is not even on the table at this point. Yeah!

~Inez

cleaning up

2009-01-03T12:15:00.002-05:00

Literally, and figuratively...John came over and helped us fell the remains of the fallen trees and get them out of the driveway. Thanks for your help John.

While the boys were working, I fell coming out of the old shed and cut my knee on the ice, about an inch slit. In addition, I have a huge bruise.

New Year's Eve was early to bed, as the power went out at 5:30 and did not come back on until after 1:30 am, and it was too cold to get the generator started. We need to find an electric start or 12 volt heat system to warm it up.

Yesterday seems to be my joint pain day, although it is still rough this morning. I also experienced nausea yesterday and today, but no vomiting - yeah!

Ed (at the cottage) is doing better, and should be home by Sunday.

I will post pictures tomorrow hopefully, as dial up is no fun with jpeg files.

~Inez

Treatment Number Three

2008-12-30T23:29:00.007-05:00

Today's treatment was great, because the port was accessed successfully yesterday, there was no delay. It took until 2:00 pm but with 3 hours of paxel, 30 minutes of hercerprin and the premeds and flush, I guess the time was right.

When I received my next appointments today, I saw that in addition to my genetics appointment next Monday, they have scheduled a surgical consult. I am thinking that this is because the results are positive and they are suggesting a double mastectomy. I guess I will know Monday.

We headed up to the cottage, and arrived to find two more trees across the driveway. The first is smaller than last week, but the other is at last 20" across and about 50' tall. it snapped off about 8' up and is hanging there, so we will deal with them in the morning. I will post pictures tomorrow, as it is cold and dark out there.

I have my blood numbers for this week, but they are in the truck until morning as it is too cold to go out there again. I will post them tomorrow with the photos of the trees.

~Inez

Success at the Port

2008-12-29T21:51:00.003-05:00

Today we visited DRCC for blood work and to see the oncologist. In an effort to avoid the delays that occur with the port problems, the nursing supervisor has decided to have my blood taken via my port and and to leave it access overnight.

After waiting 40 minutes for blood work, we were send down to the chemo suite, as the blood techs can not access ports. We waited down there for about another 15 minutes, and then I was called in. I explained the problems that occurred the last time and Tracey assured me there would not be a problem. With in minutes, she had accessed the port and drawn the blood. I did not feel a thing. When I told her about being told the problem was how I had sleep on the port, she wanted to know which nurse had said it. I did not say anything at the time, but before I left, I told it it was Nurse Cratchett (I told her her real name).

We then returned to the waiting room. I raced off the the ladies room, and when I returned Kyle informed me they called me as I went around the corner. But she was waiting for me and we got in to see the doctor very quickly.

Now, tomorrow's treatment should be a breeze, with no delay due to access and I hope to be out of there by Noon at the very latest.

I am sending out positive thought for Ed tonight, as he had a bypass done this morning. Take care buddy.

~Inez

Boxing Day 2008

2008-12-26T21:38:00.002-05:00

Mandy and her boyfriend finally made it yesterday afternoon. After some snacks, everyone was too full to eat Christmas Dinner, so we delayed it until almost 8 pm. Every seemed happy with their gifts. I got a gorgeous embroidered black fleece cardigan, red snowflake sleep pants and a matching red top, a 5 qt. Kitchen Aid enamelled cast iron casserole with lid, and my premium membership to Recipezaar. (http://www.recipezaar.com)

I am feeling better about Christmas now that it is passed, but I still am not super happy about the holiday. It is a whole lot of work, and now that the kids are 21 and 19, I think it is time they start doing more. I have to chase them both down to get them to do their Christmas shopping and this year I had to buy their gift for their Dad, and give them what I had gotten him. I bought mine own gift and gave it to Mandy to give to me and placed the online order for my gift from Greg. I guess for a chance, I would like to see them take the inititive for Christmas. I told Kyle we (he and I) are going away next year, and I am not doing anything.

I guess I should be thankful, that we still have an income, and that Mandy and I have access to no cost medical care, and that both our prognoses are good. I guess that when I look at what other people are going through, I should be more thankful.

I say a prayer tonight for everyone around who needs it and pray that they be successful in their battles. And if you are out there Ellie - hugs.

~Inez

Merry Effing Christmas

2008-12-24T20:49:00.001-05:00

Here we are at the cottage for Christmas. We arrived Monday night to find that the driveway had not yet been plowed, but the snow was soft and fluffy and we powered through it. However, the tree that had fallen across the driveway brought us to a quick stop. But Greg raced to the shop, and brought the chain saw out, and cut it into manageable pieces and we were able to continue in. There was about 15” of snow up here.

Tuesday we ventured into Renfrew for some last minute shopping. As soon as we started out, things were strange in the truck. First, the ‘Service air bag” warning was displayed. In 5 vehicles with air bags, we have never seen this warning before. By the time we got to Griffith, things had gotten much worse. The dash electronics had gone goofy. All indicators and gauges were out, but every couple of minutes, the dash would come back to life and I would know my speed and the radio would come back to life. The heater and wipers were working. I stopped, and Greg got out to check that the lights were working, and they all seemed alright, so we continued into town to the GMC dealer. When I arrived at the dealer, we realized it had not recorded any mileage from the cottage to Renfrew.

At the dealership, they witnessed the strange behaviour of the truck. At one point, after we turned it off, they could not even start it. After watching the gauges come to life, I was able to start it. They took it into the shop and hour later, they reported they could not get it to screw up again. It did not report any error codes from the incident. It seemed OK the rest of the day. We finished our shopping and headed home. The truck was fine all the way home.

After supper Greg and Kyle got the tree and decorations down from the attic.

This morning 2/3 of the tree went up along with some garlands and a few Christmas kick knacks are also set up. While the tree is mostly decorated, I am leaving the box of tree stuff out in case Mandy wants to put some more on.

Mandy and her boyfriend were going to be up today as he does not have to go back to work until Boxing Day. But she called at supper time to tell me it was too late and she still did not have her laundry done, so they are going to come up until tomorrow (Christmas Day). At this point I will believe it when I actually see her. I guess that I should put the rest of the tree decorations away; I don’t see her doing much to the tree tomorrow.

Right now I feel pretty shitty about Christmas. This is the 3rd year that Christmas Eve has been fucked up. I have decided that next year either we go away for Christmas, or if we stay home (or here at the cottage), someone else can do all the work, all the shopping, wrapping, decorating and cooking all the bloody meals. At this point I have had just about enough of this merriment. Merry effing Christmas

4 More Sleeps

2008-12-20T21:04:00.004-05:00

We are 4 days away form Christmas and nothing is going according to plans. Greg is being Greg and does not want to get off his butt and get his stuff ready. Mandy and her boyfriend were coming up Christmas Eve after having dinner at his Grandfather's, but now he isn't coming up (although that could change tomorrow). If he doesn't go up, she is thinking of coming up a couple days after us, but I really do not want her driving up there alone this time of year. And that means that Mom gets to drive home Christmas Eve probably to pick her up, something I was so happy to see end, since she no longer has to work Christmas Eve.

It is snowing, again. We had a full day of snow Friday, and now it is snowing again, They are also forecasting snow for Tuesday, and get this, rain on Wednesday. This should be fun.

~Inez

Christmas Fund Raiser for BC Children's Hospital

2008-12-14T10:37:00.001-05:00

http://wwe5.bchydro.com/2008holiday/

It doesn't cost you a penny to play so give it a try.

~Inez

More Surgery and What Do Mother's (your own) know?

2008-12-13T11:16:00.006-05:00

Mandy had her surgery on Thursday, the 12th. We arrived at Sunnybrook at 7:00 am. She checked in, then we headed to nuclear medicine for a series of injections and a scan. The first scan did not show anything and they had to wait another 15 minutes for the dyes to travel through her system.

By the time we got to day surgery, they were looking for her. After her IV was put in she wanted her cell phone and when I said no, she told me to get out, if she couldn't have her phone, she did not want me around either, so I joined Kyle in the waiting room. After about 10 minutes, we were called to the surgery area, as she changed her mind and wanted us to go up to the OR with her. After she was taken to surgery for 10:15, we went for a coffee and started to wait, she was finally back in recovery at 1:30. After a an incident with a nurse where Mandy was admonished for not wanting a suppository before her surgery, and a mixup with fast acting oxy instead of the regular she was supposed to receive, she was finally on her feet and we were able to go home.

When we got home. we had to stop at Shopper's for Seniors Day, so Kyle could use his discount to buy makeup for Mandy. She flitted about the store, visiting with past co-workers.

In the house by 6:00 pm she lays down, but her first visitor is here by 6:30. Later she goes out with Troy, who has redeemed himself by bringing her flowers. Before she went out, I reinforced the advise given to her at the hospital, limit yourself to clear fluids for balance of today, eat light small meals for a day or some, and take it easy for a couple of days getting lots of rest.

BUT WHAT DO I KNOW! Someone else's mother told her that since her surgery was so low, she could eat whatever she wanted, provided she chewed it really, really well. So what did she have to eat that night, pizza and again the next day.

And last night, Troy bought a big screen TV - just like ours - for her room, it makes his PlayStation games look better.

She returns to Sunnybrook in 3 to 4 weeks to see the surgeon and they should have all the pathology back by then. Hopefully, that will be our last visit to Sunnybrook.

It's All About Me

This last week seems to have taken a lot out of me, with my last treatment and the chaos that followed, and Mandy's surgery, I feel done in. This last week, I only left the house about 4 times, and one of them was for Thursday's hospital adventure. I find it too cold out, and just do not want to leave my cozy blankets on the couch. My fingers and toes are either frozen (to me) or numb and tingly.

I had to call the hospital a 2nd time about last Friday's treatment and hopefully that will go somewhere. I have re booked my January chemo session, as to not interfere with CSM training for work.

Last night I ventured out to the mall with Sherry for a couple hours of retail therapy. And we stopped at Tim's for coffee on the way home. I so miss William's. I can not believe that they closed the Townline location.

Today is the family Christmas but we are not going. Between my general malaise, and Mandy's surgery, I think I am better off staying home. Dad and Lois are taking us out for breakfast tomorrow.

To make everyone feel better about staying home today, I am going to roast a beef tenderloin in bacon, make smashed new pototoes roasted with olive oil and some nice veggies. I am going to try my hand at a red wine reduction with thyme and it looks like someone bought a chocolate cake for dessert.

~Inez

Day from Hell

2008-12-09T23:08:00.003-05:00

Today started with a wave of nausea, and went downhill from there. Thanks to the marvels of pharmacology, I had a great sleep, released from the ever constant joint pain.

I woke, made a pot of coffee and sat down to check my email. I was overtaken with a wave of nausea. This was the first time I experienced this in all my treatments. I took a pill and waited for it to pass, it didn't. Within 30 minutes, I was hanging on to the sides of a bowl. Thankfully, all I had all morning was water. I was back in bed soon and with the exception of a couple of hours, spent the rest of the day there. Finally, by 6:00 pm, I felt well enough to eat and Kyle made me soup and a grilled cheese sandwich.

Hopefully, tomorrow will be better.

~Inez

2008-12-07T09:33:00.003-05:00

I have been pretty quiet on here late. I have a few housekeeping issues.

Lunch With Anne

First thank you to Anne for taking me to lunch on her trip through town on November 21. It was excellent company and good food. We went here www.avantifood.com. We had a antipasta platter, and bread and olive platter and then yummy pastas.

And a real huge thank you to Scott for the beautiful flowers. But a hint, next time you buy flowers for a woman other than your wife, you should buy her some too (especially when you need her to deliver them for you) LOL

Treatment from Hell and Nurse Cratchett

Yesterday I had what was probably my worst treatment to date. It wasn’t that the drugs caused a reaction or that I was sick, it was the incompetent nurse. When we first went in, the first nurse introduced herself and said she was just back from her 10 month maternity leave. As she prepared the trays, I explained that my port was difficult to access and that I would prefer one of the nurses who has actually accessed it before to do it. She said none of them where available and processed to miss it by about an inch. She called Nurse Cratchett, the nurse she was shadowing, one who screwed it up before. She then to a poke at it, missed and claimed it was because she was pretty sure it was flipped and upside down that she missed. Then another nurse took a try and missed before they decided they had to do something else. Cratchett called for Dr. Zalewski and asked that I be sent to radiology to have an x-ray done to see if had flipped over. Cratchett then suggested that it couldn’t be accessed because I was sleeping on it wrong (huh, like can you explain that to me).

They called x-ray and they made an appointment there for me. After lots of confusion and waiting we made it down to radiation and waited some more. The doctor there assured me that it was not flipped or twisted and that there was nothing I was doing it to cause it to turn. He was able to access it, but it did take him 3 tries. In fact he actually bent 2 needles. He had to give me a freezing because it was so sore, since the Emla cream had worn some 90 minutes earlier. I guess my balling my eyes out was causing his some trouble too, along with my moans and screams.

He said that he knows why they were having trouble, that the port had to be held very tightly and accessed, and if you let it go, to say pick up the needle, it would move and you would have to start it again. He suggested that I request only the 3 nurses that had found it before be allowed to do it, and if he was available he would be willing to do it. He also assured me that it was nothing I was doing wrong, like sleeping the wrong way.

The rest of the treatment was uneventful, but it made for miserable day. In addition, now a procedure that was supposed to last 4 hours again stretched to 7 hours. Added with the fact that I was going out at 6:30 pm and still had to put a salad together for the evening, every minute that ticked by just pissed me off more. I was in such a foul mood that Irene, one of the nurses who accessed the port first try asked me what was wrong when she saw me on one of my trips to the bathroom. Oh, apparently she was there when I first asked in the morning.

Blood Numbers

LKC (white) Dec 5 - 6.8 Nov 13 - 4.8 Oct. 23 -5.7 October 2-6.0 Sept 11-5.5
ERC (red) Dec 5 -4.04Nov 13 - 3.92 Oct. 23-4.44 October 2-4.51 Sept 11-4.60
HB (hemoglobin) Dec 5 - 113 Nov 13 - 110 Oct. 23-123 October 2-123 Sept 11-128
PLT (platelets)Dec 5 - 333 Nov 13 -326 Oct. 23-320 October 2-259 Sept 11-272
Neut# Dec 5 - .75 Nov 13 -.73 Oct. 23-3.9 October 2-4.4 Sept 11-3.6

The Block Christmas party was great, and I bought home a gorgeous Christmas platter.

Hardwood Flooring and Gas Leaks

Saturday, Kyle, Mandy and headed over to Rona for a seminar on hardwood flooring. First, there was no one around, and then they paged someone how was going to collect us and take us to the seminar area. Like put up a sign people, don’t keep us guessing. While wondering around looking for the seminar area, I spotted to Rona employees looking up at the ceiling, discussing where the shutoff value was. I did not see anything dripping, and continued on my way. A few minutes later, they started evacuating the store, as they had a gas leak. We waited around for about 40 minutes, watched a fire truck and 4 police cruisers attend and then decide we would try our luck at Sunday’s seminar – hell maybe they will even now where it is going to take place.

On top of everything else on Fridady, we have Mandy's surgery coming up on Thursday, and that for me, is making me even more weepy.

~Inez

This really sucks

2008-11-18T19:08:00.003-05:00

In addition to the never ending joint pain, our furnace at the cottage is off. Starting at 2:30 am last night, and every 15 minutes until almost 4 am we received a phone call advising us that our monitored location had experienced a drop in temperature. In an attempt to turn it off, I somehow changed it to calling us every 8 to 12 minutes from about 4:30 am to 5:30. And then at 7:30 am it switched to calling every 2 hours (much more sensible). Cliff is going to check it out sometime today, so I hope that I have an answer when I get home tonight and hopefully an uninterrupted sleep (at least by the phone).

The joint pain seems a wee touch better, but I am noticing it migrating to the upper half of my body. Today I noticed pain in my upper back, and shoulders, along with a pounding headache. I went up for an hour nap and slept 3 hours, but I guess if the body needs it, it will take it.

It really, really hurts.

2008-11-17T10:01:00.005-05:00

As I stated previously, Friday started a new round of chemo - heceptin and paxol, which is not fun at all. Since Saturday afternoon, I have had major joint pain; Hips, pelvis (it think that's what it is), knee, ankle and even toes. Tylenol is keeping to a dull roar, but not making it go away completely. Right now I feel like I am in a fog. Julie, my home care nurse came by this morning and I am doing fine, blood pressure wise, on the high end of normal. Maybe the chemo has something to do with it.

Tonight we are going to my brother's, so that we can change Mandy's tires on her car. I haven't seen him for some time (September I think).

Mandy goes for her pre op on Thursday of this week. Hopefully we get a confirmed surgery date and time soon.

This is what we are having for supper tonight.

Creamy Dijon Lemon Chicken Broccoli Casserole

Make breadcrumbs with 2 slices fresh bread (in blender).

Add to 1 Tbsp. Melted butter and sauté until lightly browned, stirring constantly. Set aside.

Cut 2 large chicken breasts into 1 inch cubes. Sauté in 1 Tbsp. Butter. I now cheat and use 300 gr. sliced cooked chicken breast, from the freezer (homemade.)

Add 2 c. milk, ¼ c. mayo, ¼ c. yogurt or sour cream, 2 Tbsp. Dijon, 2 Tbsp. Lemon juice and 2 Tbsp. Corn starch.

Simmer until it coats the back of a spoon.

Meanwhile steam (Microwave on defrost) 6 cups frozen Broccoli, cauliflower and carrots until tender crisp (5 minutes).

Cut up any large pieces.

Spray 9 x 13 glass pan with Pam. Spread steamed veggies.

Top with chicken and sauce.

Combine breadcrumbs and 1/3 c. Parmesan cheese and sprinkle of top of sauce.

Bake at 350 F. for 15 to 20 minutes, until bubbly.

Serve with basmati rice.

~Inez

The Last Week.

2008-11-05T07:55:00.005-05:00

Working at the Cottage.

Last Weekend, Kyle and I went to the cottage Friday and returned on Monday. While there we took our summer chrome 20" wheels off the truck and put our all seasons. Kyle gave me the cordless drill to make the job easier and he lifted the wheels on to the truck for me (I didn't do it all myself) this time.

Anyway, while seating the nuts on the third wheel, is was complaining to Kyle about the drill reaching tight, and the torque spinning the drill. He told me to put my hand on the battery to stop it. I ques I misunderstood him and tried stopping it with my forehead. I now have a lovely bump and bruise. It was not as bad as I could have been, because I got ice on it pretty quick and kept in on most of the night. Yesterday, Mandy wanted to know why I had black bruises along the bridges of my nose. Seems the bruises drained to those spots,and all my scrubbing didn't do any good.

Blood Numbers

Yesterday I went for blood work and to see the oncologist.

here are my updated numbers

LKC (white) Nov 13 - 4.8 Oct. 23 -5.7 October 2-6.0 Sept 11-5.5
ERC (red) Nov 13 - 3.92 Oct. 23-4.44 October 2-4.51 Sept 11-4.60
HB (hemoglobin) Nov 13 - 110 Oct. 23-123 October 2-123 Sept 11-128
PLT (platelets) Nov 13 -326 Oct. 23-320 October 2-259 Sept 11-272
Neut# Nov 13 -.73 Oct. 23-3.9 October 2-4.4 Sept 11-3.6

We saw Dr. Zalewski but with my 1:20 pm appointment, we were not called in until after 2:30 and Kelly told us they were still seeing the mornings appointments. We did not get out of there until after 3:00pm. While there the doctor told me that the next appointment would be a long one, so I figured may 4 or 5 hours. My appointment was for 9:45 am and we went in on time. We walked out of there at 4:45 pm (7 hours).

Anyway, I got my first infusion of Herceptin today. It will continue for about 1 year (every three weeks).

I also received my first of 4 infusions of Taxil (paclitaxel). This is one of the reasons we were there so long. The infusion took over 3 hours. This is because of the possibility of side effects, They infuse it very, very slowly. And then they monitor your vitals (blood pressure and temperature) every 15 minutes.

Blood pressure is taken using that torture device that squeezes your arm to while in an inch of your life, such fun, and then to add insult to injury, the machine would not operate properly on battery, and kept having to repeat the test each time.

~inez

Why Does Everything Taste Like Crap

2008-10-30T18:35:00.003-04:00

For the past week, everything I have eaten has left a furry feeling in my mouth. It was like my tongue had grown fur and taste seemed to stick to it, and hang around for way longer than was pleasant. I mean, on first blush, things tasted great but an hour later I could not get rid of the taste. Even water, the most benign of things, tasted horrible, and it is not Dasanti horrible, just a tinny, metallic feeling a just couldn't shake the taste of. It seems to be easing off, but there is a lingering effect still.

And smells are off, I can not put my finger on it, but things are not smelling right. Last night at Linda's I could smell a vanilla-bread pudding aroma, but they were having tuna casserole (it could have been worse i guess, smelling tuna instead of vanilla) but there seems to be a sweet smell around, almost cloying. I quess I could be smell alot worse things so I will just deal with it.

I seem to be sleeping better now. I have actually slept most of the night for the past few days, although I have been taking naps in the afternoon.

This morning I left for my appointment at Nuclear Medicine, only to have Kyle call me and tell me it was next week. I had my date book open to the wrong page. (It's the chemo's faulft and that's my story).

And speaking of taste, a few people have asked for the tiramisu recipe, so here it is, from the hills of Siena in Tuscany.

4 eggs, separated
150 gr. white sugar
500 gr. marscapone cheese
1 package ladyfingers
4 oz espresso - cooled
2 oz liqueur (I use frangelico but you can use, whiskey, Bourbon, rye or almond liquor)
2 oz. grated chocolate. (i use 70% dark Cocoa)

Select a pan that will accommodate 2 layers of dessert. Dry fit the lady fingers, trimming as required to completely cover the bottom of the dish. Do the same for the second layer, and set those biscuits aside.

Separate eggs, and beat the whites until firm peaks appear. Set aside.

Beat yolks with sugar, until very fluffy. Beat in marscapone until smooth. Fold in egg whites.

Set aside.

Combine espresso and liquor in a shallow dish. Quickly dip each lady finger in coffee mixture then lay in pan. Complete first layer. Spread with half of the egg/marscapone mixture. Sprinkle with 1/2 of the grated chocolate.

Complete the second layer of ladyfingers, dipping in coffee mixture, than placing in dish. Top with remaining egg/marscapone mixture, and sprinkling with the remaining grated chocolate.

Chill until serving time and dust with cocoa powder just before serving.

Serves 10 to 12

~Inez

New Favourites and Oldies Revisited

2008-10-27T12:17:00.004-04:00

This weekend, I whipped a batch of Tiramisu from the recipes we collected at la scuola di cucina with lella in Siena. I goofed, added some of the sugar for the egg yolks to the egg whites. But I soldiered on and added more sugar for the yolks. I used grated 70% cocoa dark chocolate on top and it was heavenly.

But how did this bring me an old favourite?

A couple of weeks ago, Irene and I went to visit Aunt Rene. While there, I asked her if she might have a copy of Mom's Rhubarb Custard Pie recipe. Like everyone else, her answer was no, but after devouring 2 servings of tiramisu Saturday, I called her to see if we could drop over on Sunday and bring her some. She said of course and that she had been meaning to call. She found a slip of page, torn from a steno pad it looks like, with a recipe for rhubarb custard pie. It wasn't her writing but she wanted me to look at is. Sure enough, it is Mom's recipe. I can't wait until spring for the tender rhubarb to try it. I might have enough in the freezer to make a small pie, but I think it is tougher, late fruit, and I don't want to taint the pie with it.

I have still not been sleeping well. Usually within a day or two of my treatment, I find myself awake at between 3 and 4 in the morning, unable to get back to sleep. I find myself getting up and watching TV or playing on the computer for a couple of hours, then heading back to bed for 3 or 4 hours.

I seem to have been on my feet since treatment last week. I need to take a break.

~Inez

Today was the last treatment of the first chemo cycle.

2008-10-24T22:17:00.004-04:00

Today was the last treatment of the first chemo cycle.

Diane was not available to access my port so I took my chances with Maureen, and she got it first time. Not that it was painless, but it was bearable. I did use the elma cream and it did help. It only numbs the skin, so I did experience some discomfort. My treatment went quicker today. It took less than 2 1/2 hours today. It does not seem to be any worst than any of the other treatments.

My blood numbers this time are as follows

LKC (white) Oct. 23 -5.7 October 2-6.0 Sept 11-5.5
ERC (red) Oct. 23-4.44 October 2-4.51 Sept 11-4.60
HB (hemoglobin) Oct. 23-123 October 2-123 Sept 11-128
PLT (platelets) Oct. 23-320 October 2-259 Sept 11-272
Neut# Oct. 23-3.9 October 2-4.4 Sept 11-3.6

Before I start the next round, I have to have another heart scan - a Muga Scan at Rest. This will be next week.

Mandy's appointment for her surgery has been booked, then cancelled and rebooked. I rebooked for December, after her exams, so that she does not miss any more time from school. We do not have an absolute date, but it should be the week of the 15th.

Because of a nurse's visit at like 9 am on Monday and a doctor's appointment later at 2:30, I guess we are not heading up to the cottage this weekend, maybe we will go next week.

Opening the mail lately has been such a lift. This week a card came from Cornie and Lorraine - it was such a lift, and then this morning, just before leaving for the hospital, a parcel came from Anne, with a beautiful pair of hand knitted socks. I am assuming she knitted these with her own hands (I am sure she will correct me is I am wrong) and they are lovely. I will try to post a couple of photos tomorrow, of the socks. my wig and my shiny head.

Good night.

~Inez

So Much To Say, So Little To Say

2008-10-22T12:14:00.003-04:00

We had been away for 10 days, and dial up at the cottage is nothing if not slow. Trying to access company email took so long all I could do was read it. By the time I tried to respond, the server would log me out.

Anyway, Thanksgiving passed and we had turkey and ham. Troy was up with Mandy for the weekend and we put him to work. He cut sumac, cut firewood and worked hard. Poor guy, hopefully we haven't scared him off. As we ate I was asking, really, what did we have to be thankful for - yes I know they caught both of our cancers, by why us, and why together?

Because we did not plan ahead, we had to return home to vote on Tuesday. We returned up on Wednesday, Greg with us. Thursday, we went to Calabogie to go shooting at the quarry. We got off to a wonderful start. We arrived, only to have Greg inform us that he forgot the keys to the ammo box. Since going back to the cottage meant an 80 km round trip, we continued into town where Kyle purchase new locks and borrowed a bolt cutter at the Home Hardware. Problem solved. We did the little shopping we had to do, and returned to the quarry, where Greg tried to talk me into firing the shotgun again. NO WAY, that sucker kicks. He enjoyed his time there.

After a couple of hours over shooting, we returned to the cottage in time for supper. The rest of the weekend we did yard work. Kyle got the chain replaced on the chainsaw and got some trimming done, we rake and rake and raked. We trimmed the low pine branches along the driveway and raked some more. Kyle cleaned up the old shed and reorganized that.

As we head into my final treatment of the first cycle I have noticed some things. First, there is a dryness in my eyes, but they seem to tear up at night, and i wake up with crusty eyes. My balance had been off; first I fell in the bath and then I tripped raking and almost did a face plant into the back of Ed and Sheila's little boat (my fault, not the boat's) but I was able to get my arm up in time. A couple of times walking, I felt very uncoordinated, like I forgot how to move my feet. I will watch for these things after this next treatment.

I spoke to Kelly, my oncology nurse about the problems they were having with the port. While there is nothing surgically they can, short of replacing it, she did agree that I should be very insistant and request the Diane only be the one to access it. This coming Thursday, in addition to me regular blood work, they will be taking the blood for the genetic testing. Results should be in by the end of January.

~Inez

Sunnybrook and Woodbridge

2008-10-08T12:33:00.007-04:00

Mandy had her 2nd cone biopsy at Sunnybrook yesterday. This one was the laser treatment and it was quite uncomfortable for her. She came out in tears, scaring another young woman waiting for her turn to go in. Many felt quite bad about that.

After leaving the hospital we visited Alex Farms for some Gorgonzola and gnocchi. We then took a drive up to Woodbridge for some Italian deals. I picked up some more cheese, breads and things.

Maybe someone can tell me where in Woodbridge to go to find some "Tuscan" pottery to make up for what I did not buy in Italy.

Last night I finally got a good nights sleep. Before Mandy's appointment, I got only about 1-1/2 to 2 hours sleep, but last night I slept from 11 to 7:30 am. I feel a lot better today, except that tummy feels out of sorts.

Today was my first visit with the genetics department at the cancer centre. I have decided to be tested for the BRCA 1/2 genes. I feel that it is a good idea, and it gives us an indication as to whether or not Mandy should be tested in the future.

Because I am scheduled to start radiation in February of 2009, they are expediting the testing and it will only take 4 months instead of 1 year. This is because if you test positive and want to consider double mastectomy, with reconstruction, it is better to be done before the radiation starts, so I am thinking we will be delaying the start of the radiation, until at least the results are in.

The Week In Review

2008-10-04T09:11:00.004-04:00

So this has been quite a week.

Update on Mandy

On Wednesday, we took Mandy to meet with the surgeon from Sunnybrook Health Sciences, Dr. Covens. He is on of the leading ob/gyn treating cancer in North America(if not the world). She DOES NOT require the trachelectomy. They will be doing another cone biopsy on the 7th of October, next Tuesday. They are still be doing the laparoscopic sentinel node mapping and bilateral pelvic node dissection (examination and possible removal of the lymph nodes). That will occur sometime in November.

My New Hair

I finally got the bangs on my wig trimmed. It looks really good. I will have to post photos later as the camera is gone away with Mandy.

Update on me

Thursday was my day to meet with the doctor and for my pre-treatment blood work. My numbers this time are as follows:

LKC (white) October 2-6.0 Sept 11-5.5
ERC (red) October 2-4.51 Sept 11-4.60
HB (hemoglobin) October 2-123 Sept 11-128
PLT (platelets) October 2-259 Sept 11-272
Neut# October 2-4.4 Sept 11-3.6

Yesterday, Friday, I had my third round of chemo therapy. Because Kyle has been fighting off snuffles for the past 2 weeks he stayed home and Karen came with me.

They again had trouble finding my port and it took 3 tries again. The nurse finally had to get Diane the wonder nurse to do it. Next time I go in, I am asking for her right off the bat. This week's nurse did however, call to get me a script for the Emla cream for me. This stuff is applied of the site of the Port an hour before the procedure and it numbs the skin to avoid the sting (hopefully this and first time in will make it less painful).

Karen was a great help, and performing her butt clenching exercises to take my mind off the pain was inspired. I actually had to open my eyes to watch (previously they had been clenched tight to deflect the pain). I don't think the guy in the next chair appreciated them (the butt clenches) as much as I did though.

So far so good, I was feeling a little woozy when I got up this morning, but I am feeling pretty good now. Last night when I got home, i made my angel hair pasta with broccoli. I prepped all the veggies in the morning, so it was on the table in less than 30 minutes. The trick is to start cooking the veggies as soon as you put the water on for the pasta soon you can put the drained pasta right into the sauce.

Garlic infused Angel Hair with Broccoli (makes 4 main course servings)

1 lb (500 gr) angel hair pasta (broken in half)
2 bunches Broccoli, trimmed into 1-1/2 inch florets, quartered into small pieces and stems peeled and julienned into matching lengths
1 red peppers, julienned into 1-1/2" pieces
1 small onion, red preferred, sliced length way through the root into 1/8" wedges
1 c. Extra virgin Olive Oil (the only Olive oil I buy) (divided)
1/3 c. chopped garlic, I buy large jars of it pre chopped
1 lemon, zested and cut into 1/8ths
salt and pepper to taste
2 c. finely grated Parmesan cheese (we use a micro plane)
1 c reserved pasta cooking water

Prep all the veggies before you start. I often do them the night before and bag them so all I have to do when I get home is zest and cut the lemon.

Set water to boil for pasta. When it boils, salt generously and add pasta, stirring occationally to keep from sticking. Meanwhile...

In a large stir fry pan, heat 1/2 c. Olive oil with the Garlic. Simmer 5 minutes until fragrant.

Add onion and Broccoli stems and cook 3 - 4 minutes. Add in remaining broccoli florets and red pepper. Stir until tender-crisp. Add lemon zest and salt and pepper to taste. Add remaining olive oil.

Before draining pasta, set aside 1 c. of the cooking liquid. Drain pasta and add to the veggies - DO NOT rise.

Remove pan from heat. Toss pasta with veggies to combine. Sprinkle with 1/2 the cheese, then drizzle with about 1/4 c. of the pasta water. Toss with blend (cheese should dissolve into the mix) Repeat with the remaining cheese and 1/4 c. pasta water. If it seems dry, add a little more water and toss. It should just glisten.

Serve with additional cheese and lemon wedges.

Note: I know this seems like a lot of oil, but it is the sauce, along with the cheese and pasta water. And it is Olive oil and good for you. Try it this way once, before cutting the amount of oil. It should not be greasy at all.

~Inez

Cervical Cancer

2008-09-29T10:38:00.005-04:00

This is one of the hardest posts to write. On Friday, 26 September, Mandy (our 19 year old daughter)saw the doctor from Sunnybrook.

He advised her that they no longer classified what she has as micro-invasive cancer, but as"'real' cancer, that would kill her if not treated". An further reading of the biopsy revealed cancer cells in the blood steam and she will require Cancer Surgery, not a procedure. She sees the surgeon who will be doing the surgery on Wednesday and will probably have her surgery within another 2 weeks.

It is an newer procedure they are talking about, called a trachelectomy, where the take a portion of the cervix and they will also perform laparoscopic sentinel node mapping and bilateral pelvic node dissection (examination and possible removal of the lymph nodes).

Kind of makes my issue with needing the bangs of my wig trimmed pretty inconsequential.

~Inez

The cottage and Taste buds

2008-09-24T11:16:00.003-04:00

I have been amiss in writing. Last weekend we went to the cottage for 3 days. Gloria and Kevin joined us for a couple of days. I want to thank them for their help in getting the dock in, and to apologize again to Kevin for not catching him when he fell off the pier into the lake. I guess next summer; the case of James Ready 5.5 is on us.

For about the last week or so, I have been complaining about the last batch of butter I bought not having much salt. This weekend I noticed that I have no salt taste buds left (or very few). Even straight salt, has little or no taste. Is this another side effect of the chemo?, I don’t know.

The little bit of hair that I have, all 1/4" of it is falling out a an alarming rate. My head now has a glorious crop of bald patches. Later today I go to pick up my wig. I will post pictures tomorrow, both of my bald patches and my new do.

~Inez

Look Good, Feel Better

2008-09-17T09:48:00.004-04:00

Yesterday I attended the Look Good, Feel Better session at Hearth Place. We had a nice morning discussing skin care, make up, head covering etc. The makeup tips were very helpful, but I don't know how much I will continue. I am not just a make up person, but the knowledge is useful. Mandy was funny, she came in and commented on my eye brows looking so natural. How did they do that she asked? then she laughed and said she forgot I still had my eye brows - what a sweetie - so observant.

I saw the wig ladies, and my wig is languishing in customs somewhere. Hopefully I will have it before the end of the week.

Last night I taught my first class of the season. It was a a busy day, with the Look Good session, the afternoon in Toronto and class in the evening. I was tired by 11:00 but then aren't we all.

~Inez

Poll closed...and the winner is My Favourite

2008-09-14T09:51:00.005-04:00

My favourite won with a 2 to 1 margin (14 to 7).

That is the one I ordered, but I may get short and sassy as a back up.

We went to the Zion United Church BBQ dinner yesterday with Dad and Lois, Issac,Liz and Irene. It was a really good dinner. They served Beef, baked potatoes, gravy, corn (on and off the cob), sliced tomatoes, coleslaw, chili sauce (yum yum), rolls and 4 types of pie. Many dinners sampled all four, lemon meringue, pumpkin, peach and apple. They serve 450-500 paying quests and then serve the staff, some 75 to 100 persons, volunteers all.

I still am experiencing hiccups, usually at night, but I believe it is a side effect of the anti-nausea medication. They only seem to occur in the first few days following the treatments, when I am taking the Amend and they are a listed side effect.

THIS IS NOT PG
This may be too much information for some, but I think I know why they had trouble with my port. I am NOT small breasted LOL, and when the port was installed, I was laying flat on my back and the girls where unrestrained, trying to escape to my armpits. When they try to access the port, I am sitting upright with a bra on, so the angle changes. Hopefully this insight, along with some topical anesthetic cream will make the next treatment go smoother.

Hopefully, we are heading up to the cottage later today, until sometime on Tuesday. I am teaching a 6:00 that night so I have to be home. The kids will be fending for themselves again.

A correction to my chemo list - the herceptin will last one full year. The first 3 month combined with Paclitaxel (4 cycles) then will continue for 9 more month (total of 16 cycles) for one year total.

~Inez

Treatment # 2

2008-09-12T22:27:00.004-04:00

Today was treatment # 2. Kyle came with me and Mandy dropped us off and picked us up.

It did not go quite as smooth as I hoped it would. First, they had trouble locating the port and the 2 nurses could not agree where it was. Apparently, it has shifted position and both nurses missed it. A third attempt was successful, but the first 2 stabs left a stinging feeling. The treatment itself went pretty smoothly, and we were done in less than 3 hours.

For supper tonight, we headed to Swiss Chalet for their rotisserie chicken. I again have a touch of heartburn, and I forgot to get my script filled yesterday. Oh well, I guess it will be Pepto tonight.

I got my blood numbers. For those who know these things, they are:

LKC (white) 5.5
ERC (red) 4.60
HB (hemoglobin) 128
PLT (platelets) 272
Neut# 3.6

~Inez

Wigs and Doctor's Appointments

2008-09-11T20:42:00.005-04:00

Today was my first oncology appointment since my first treatment.

The doctor said that my blood numbers were good, but I forgot to write them down. He did say that 1 week after my treatment, my white blood count was low, and that I should avoid sick people. I also got him to prescribe something to help with the heartburn.

Anyway, we are on track for tomorrow's treatment. Mandy will be dropping us off and picking us up after we are done.

After the visit it the hospital, I went for another wig fitting. I am posting some pictures Kyle took and you can vote for your favourite. The vote will not influence my decision, but I will let you know the fan's favourite.

Short and Sassy

My Favourite

I don't think so

~Inez

2008-09-07T21:18:00.004-04:00

Ready to shave it off

Well, today was the day. Following the start of hair loss yesterday, I decided to be done with this, and have Kyle shave it all off today.

He had some fun with it. First a little punk and then the final cut, with a little duck.

Some observations.

First of all, it is cold outside. I did not notice this in the afternoon, but this evening without hair, I was actually cold.

Getting out in the morning is going to be easy, nothing to comb, just a quick buff. And I am going to save a fortune on shampoo and conditioner.

I expect in the next few days the stubble will be gone too.

Hair Loss

2008-09-06T18:17:00.004-04:00

Well it has finally happened - 15 days into my first 21 day cycle. This morning, when I combed my fingers through my hair, I came away with a handful. I am going to get Kyle to shave it all off for me. He wants to cut a rubber duckie in - I think I will let him try. Pictures tomorrow.

For those that have asked my what kind of Chemo I am receiving, I will try to explain what I understand. The Regiment is called AC--> Taxol Chemotherapy. The plan consists of 8 treatments cycles, each lasting 21 days (3 weeks). During the first 4 cycles, two drugs, Doxorubicin and Cyclophosphamide will be administered through my port. For the next 4 cycles, I will be receiving Paclitaxel along with Herceptin. After the 4 cycles are completed, I will continue with the Herceptin for I am assuming, another 6 months (9 months total). I may be wrong in the length of time for the Herceptin.

Following the completion of the first 4 cycles, I will be receiving radiation for 5 weeks/5 days a week, starting sometime in February, following my planning session at the end of January.

I am not happy with the way my port incision has healed - a misunderstanding by the nurse had me keep a waterproof dressing over it until last weekend. It is healing better now, but I think there is going to be a big scar.

Buy for now - I have a date with a barber.

Labour Day Weekend 2008

2008-09-01T22:28:00.003-04:00

The weather this weekend was glorious. Warm days and cool evenings. The water in the lake was so warm, but I am still waiting for the OK to go in.

The pain in my side has continued pretty much the same, better in the mornings, worse at night. Helping Kyle with the crib stairs at the lake aggravated it, so I watched.

Last night I experienced deep muscle cramps in my calves. These are very similar to the cramps experienced during pregnancy. Both times (once for each leg) woke Kyle up. The only way to ease the cramp is to rub/massage it out. I don't know if this pain is related to the treatments.

We had a traumatic trailering episode this weekend. While hauling some spoiled bags of cement to the stair location, the trailer jumped off the ball of the truck, bent/broke the safety chains, slammed into the back of the truck, rode up along the tail gate, then crashed into the guard rail on the other side of the road. Thankfully there were no other vehicles on the road, and the guard rail kept it out of the lake. Looks like I need to replace the tail gate and rear bumper of the truck.

I still have my hair, but am hoping to post some wig photos so everyone can vote (non binding) on the different selections.

What is this pain?

2008-08-29T13:50:00.004-04:00

Since sometime on Wednesday, I have been having a strange pain on my right side, below my rib cage, front and back. At night it is so bad I can not even turnover, and I kept poor Kyle awake Wednesday night (he said I was moaning and groaning like a ghost all night).

Yesterday I visited Dr. P and he ordered an ultrasound, blood work and chest x-ray. So far, there does not seem to be any cause they can see. I spoke to the primary care nurse at the Cancer Centre and she noted everything, but again, it does not seem to be related to the treatments. It feels better in the mornings than the evenings, but the meds (percs) take the edge off to let me get to sleep.

We have decided to head up to the cottage (we have been waffling back and forth), because if I stay home, I will just have to deal with kids.

It is one week since my first treatment and except for indigestion and hiccups, there has been no reactions. I still have my hair, less the hank I cut out and coloured for wig matching.

I guess we will see you all from the other side of the Labour Day weekend.

Wigs

2008-08-27T21:10:00.004-04:00

Today I went looking at wigs to prepare for the inevitable hair loss. Since I haven't had any other effects from the chemo, I figure this is going to be what I suffer the most. Yesterday I visited Hearth Place, the cancer support centre and picked up pre-tied scarf to be ready.

I narrowed wig selection down to 5. Colour is not an issue, I will be going with an auburn. Style will be feathered, with a layered look. I will post pictures as soon as I make my final choice. I will be taking Mandy with me for the final selection, along with Kyle again.

So far, still no side effects that I can identify. Today I am having a terrible pain in my side, right side back. It feels like a muscle spasm. At times, I can barely stand up straight. If it is no better tomorrow, I will the call the cancer center just to rule anything out.

I thought I was dong pretty good with things until I went into Heath Place. As soon as I spoke to someone I broke down. They are pretty good in there and very helpful.

2008-08-25T10:09:00.002-04:00

Ok Day 4 of my first Chemo round. Nothing - last night maybe a little heartburn but the supper of bacon wrapped pork tender loin, buttered new potatoes and cauliflower and carrots with butter might have something to do with it. If I don't eat at regular times (like that never happened before?) and feel a little woozy is it the chemo or low blood sugar? Like right now.

I am heading to the kitchen to prep tonight’s supper. First, the potatoes and veg from last night, I am going to sauté up some onion and celery, add the potatoes, cauliflower and carrot and some stock, then puree, add a little cream and cheddar for a nice soup.

Then I am going to make my pork with Peppers and Carrots. See the recipe here http://www.recipezaar.com/185269
It is always a family favourite.

In The Beginning

2008-08-24T13:06:00.001-04:00

This odyssey started out on April Fool's Day. During my annual checkup, Dr. Panowyk asked, "How long has this nipple been inverted?” I knew this was not going to be a fun trip.

On May 20th I went for my mammogram, the technician asked, "How long has this nipple been inverted?” I figured I was going to hear this question quite often. She decided to take some extra pictures of my left side.

Within a couple of days, I got a call asking me to return for more pictures, so on May 27th I had my Second Mammogram and then I went for an Ultrasound. The technician asked the same question, "How long has this nipple been inverted?”. Following the ultrasound, the doctor came in and advised me that they wanted to do a needle biopsy. I explained that I was leaving for Italy in 9 days and they fit me in for 2 days later, On May 29th the needle biopsy was done. Luckily it was ay 8 o’clock on the breast so the bruising was not visible with all my new tops and bathing suits.

I called my doctors office and asked that unless they had positive results for me, I did not want to hear anything before I left, and that I would be in the first day I was home. That day was June 23rd and the results from the biopsy were positive for cancer. Later that day I received a call from the surgeon’s office, and had my appointment set for 2 days later, June 25th.

The surgeon informed me that he could remove the tumour and nipple, along with the lymph nodes, followed by radiation or a mastectomy and no radiation. Because I knew that the “no radiation” was not guaranteed, I went for the lumpectomy. They scheduled me for a battery of tests to rule out any other tumours, and on July 3rd I had a Bone scan, Chest X-ray and Ultrasounds (abdominal and uterine).

July 8th arrived and I showed up at day Surgery for the lumpectomy and removal of most lymph nodes. It went well and I was home by 8:00 pm. I had a little of a rough night, in that I could not even keep down water. I tried ginger ale and that was not much better. I tried some dry toast but that was even worse.This morning we had Mandy (DD) bring some fruit, Melba toast and apple juice. I managed to keep them down and things began looking up.The visiting nurse came for drainage and dressing care and was quite pleased with the way things progressed.

Jul 17, 2008, 11:13am
YIP~YIP~YIPPEE I HAD A SHOWERI HAD A SHOWER You have no idea how great I feel right now - last night when DD was here, the sweet, darling, adorable child pointed out that I finally smelt like I hadn't had a shower for over a week (I do love her dearly)Anyway, armed with the nurse's OK and roll of surgical tape and large ZIPLOC Freezer bag (we Are talking G cup puppies here girls)I set out to bathe myself under cascading water. Taped up in my freezer bag with enough tape to make Red Green proud, I looked like an x-rated ad for Ziploc products. Igor, my drainage bag, (this guy I Will not miss when he finally leaves my side), was firmly taped to my thigh.I forgot how nice it was to feel really, really clean. I think I will spend the rest of the day curled up with a good book.Yesterday at the LCBO I bought a bottle of Bacardi white and it came with a spiffy muddler. I was going to buy one yesterday morning and did not; it was $10 and was wooden. I thought I could do better with a dowel and a carving knife. This one is brushed steel with a mint green base, with the Bacardi bat cast in the bottom of it, I will have to post a photo of it later. Maybe after supper, I will forgot my pain killers and mix myself a pitcher of Mojitos.
August 15 2008

Let’s talk about Mandy first. For those of you who do not know she is our 19 year old daughter. During her annual check up she had another favorite of woman everywhere, an internal exam and Pap test. OF COURSE the Pap came back showing moderate to severe dysplasia. While we were in Italy, she was treated using L.E E.P. She received a call from her doctor after we returned home to come in and see her G.P. about her results. He advised her that the pathology of the sample taken showed Carcinoma-in-situ or micro invasive cancer. She would require another colposcopy and he was referring her to the oncologists at DRCC. Her appointment was yesterday.A side note, usually the first word out of every doctor’s mouth was, "we never see this in people your age", and yesterday was no exception.Dr. Bryson, from Kingston, was very nice. He drew her a picture of what was happening and discussed some options. She will probably require at least another L.E.E.P., at the very least. She has also been referred to another doctor, from Sunnybrook, who specializes in a more intensive L.E.E.P. She will be seeing him on the 26 of September (again at DRCC)Now on to me, as told previously, I had a pretty good recovery from my surgery. The drain came out 17 days following the surgery and I have been feeling pretty good. I have fairly good range of motion and have done most of the exercises except for the ones requiring both arms (more on that later). I feel pretty well back to normal. I received a call from Dr. Panowyk (my G.P.) to come in and see him about my bone scan. (Cause for panic). The scan showed that the cancer had NOT matastized (sp) but it did point out that I have arthritis in my a c joint (part of the shoulder). Anyway, barring any problems, I see the bone guy next Wednesday (20th, I have only been waiting to see him since the end of March, but I digress). Yesterday was my first appointment at DRCC. I saw Dr. Zalewski. It appears the cancer was Stage 2 Grade 2. However they detected the presence of the HER-2 tumour antigen. The aggressiveness of the cancer Grade 2 means a 60 % possibity of recurrence in the next 10 years, and presence of HER-2 increase the risk to 80 to 90%. To combat this, I will be starting chemo on Friday the 22nd. I will be ungoing two type of treatment. Combined, these two treatments reduce the odds to 20-30%. The first will be over a 6 month period and the other over a 9 month period. Because these treatments will be every 3 week for over the next year, I will have a vascular access port installed (hey I'm getting modded).This odyssey begins Monday with a teaching session at the DRCC. We left there with a shit load of reading to do (homework), so I will update everyone after my teaching (learning session) on Monday. I plan on following my Mother's path with this thing, beating it and going on to outlive the cancer.
August 18th Meet with Kelly for chemo learning session.

August 19th Muga Scan (heart) OK

August 20th finally see Dr Chharbra fro my shoulder. Only a 5 month wait, Almost do cartwheels out office, after cortisone shot.

August 20th Meet with Dr. Koll and Darrilyn (Radiation oncologist and his nurse, also Mandy’s nurse). Radiation to follow 6 months of chemo Starting Mid-February 5 days a week for 5 weeks.

August 21st Another visit to DRCC. This time blood work and signing consent for body modification

August 22nd Insertion of port and fist chemo treatment. First of they couldn’t get a good ground on me (no green light, I asked if it was like my trailer lights when we couldn’t get them grounded and the lights didn’t work but they never did answer that question.) They ended up moving the pad, (cold and wet), then replacing it, then adding a second, then a third, then a 4th on the other leg. After fiddling with the wires, they got a green light. I kept asking during the procedure if the light was still green “Yes, it is still green”, replied the chorus
They decided as they were disconnecting the ground, pulling all those griping adhesive pads off, that they should put in a call to tech services, as this ground fault had happened earlier in the week too (ya’ think?)

As the doctor was making the cut to form the pocket for the implant, I cringed and they decided to give me more freezing. Actually it was not too bad and they had me over to the DRCC by 10:00 am. Since my chemo was not scheduled until 3:30 they were monitoring my vitals until 11:00 then they were going to send me home until later, unless a cancellation came in before I left. They came in at 10:30 and announced they had a 10:45 cancellation. I was never so happy to hear they were going to pump me full of noxious drugs.

The actual treatment was not that big a deal. The port means no hunting for veins. The worst thing so far is the time. Waiting for the anti-nausea meds to kick in and the time it takes the nurse to set you up and actually administer the first med from 2 huge syringes. The next med is administered through an IV pump over 30 minutes, unless you get brain freeze (you know, that thing that happens when you drink your slushy too fast, or eat too much ice cream). Luckily I didn’t have any brain freeze. Kyle went out and got me a slice of pizza, as I had to fast overnight and all they have to give you as digestive cookies and ice cream. I skipped the ice cream (fear of brain freeze). Anyway, Maggie picked us up and we were home by 2:00 at the latest.